Dearest Gin,
You and I have had a wonderful relationship. For many years have we shared the same body, albeit more often than possibly necessary. And up until now, we've been friends. I don't know what I did to offend you, but I would really really like to be friends again; I hate being in fights with you - it burns me up inside. You used to treat me so well, and everyone liked you and I together; we were a great team. I realized this morning however, that you had left me... bitter and confused. I felt used up, cheated. We just can't go on like this. And until you're willing on treating be better, I'm going to be calling Vodka instead of you. He'll be thrilled I'm leaving you for him, if only for a little while. When you feel like growing up a little and acting nicer, you give me a call.
Missing you until then,
Devlyn